30
Apr
08

Post Script: Day One, Manhattan

Before taking the red-eye to New York, I met a couple of friends for a little sushi and sake before I got on the plane. Needless to say, after another 2 drinks on the plane I was out cold,… which, of course, was the perfect opportunity for StarGirl and Lauren to bust out the silver Sharpie and write on my fucking face. I caught them halfway through the heart they were making. Those bitches!

We landed at 6:00 a.m. and right after I changed my phone to EST I had a total blonde moment. I called the CFO of the company in San Diego to tell him we had landed. I forgot we were four hours ahead. What a friggin’ airhead!

We attempted to check into our hotel but of course only one room was available so we piled into Michelle’s room and everyone passed out wherever they could find a pillow. Incidentally, Leopard J. Ferry and Ace shared a bed. When I went to their room, the pillows were on opposite ends of the bed, but I suspect they spooned.

A few of us showered, grabbed a quick bite, and headed out to explore. StarGirl and I were leering at all the hot guys, pretty much rubber necking. East coast boys have style!

We were supposed to meet up with the rest of the crew and make a trip to the Statue of Liberty… how cool would be to have a photo of us in our Naughty America shirts in front of the Statue of Liberty!? However, their navigator, Matt, underestimated the time it takes to walk 793 blocks to Battery Park and we missed the last ferry out.

Instead, Lauren, Stargirl and I cruised to Chinatown to go buy cheap knock-off purses with Ace and his two hottie friends.

Later, we met up with Brian, our cameraman, who had just arrived with Alexis Texas, Angelina Valentine and Mika Tan. We made our way back to the hotel bar and had some drinks before our 9:45 dinner reservation at the upscale Koi, next to the Bryant Park Hotel.

StarGirl, weighing in at 101 pounds, decided to drink a wee bit too much before dinner and by the time 10:00 p.m. rolled around,… well, let’s just say… she was louder than the human megaphone that she already is.

StarGirl and I have been good friends for about 12 years now and I have learned how to deal with this behavior. I simply ask her to take it down a notch and I proceed to glare at her until she pouts, simmers down a bit, and sits still. This usually works for about 15 minutes and tonight was no different.

Soon enough, Alexis saw the Tasmanian Devil in StarGirl and began making out with her. Being the control freak that I am, I was trying to order food for 14 hungry people. Before I knew it, StarGirl was under the table “checking out Mika Tan’s underwear.”

That’s my story and I am sticking to it.

After the meal from hell (Actually, it was so delicious and it was nice to be able to sit next to “Guy-On-Couch” from www.naughtycountryclub.com and shoot the shit and shoot some sake!) we trekked to a club where Michelle was celebrating the 11th anniversary of her 21st birthday.

We ended up at a rocking place called McGovern’s and danced the night away. StarGirl, on the other hand, was partying in the hotel bar with a group of people when she must have realized it wasn’t any of us! She sent texts to a few of us…. “hey where did you guys go!?” … “Omg, we left the place 2 hours ago.” Anyways, I am sure she made some new friends.

  





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